Monday, April 27, 2009

Me, Myself n Mine

Arrrghhhh ... my entry started with sugh ....

Two weeks ago ... i was mc due to back pain .... three days ago i mc again .. this time shoulder pain ... my shoulder became so stiff that i couldn't manage to lift my arm .... i went to clinic... the doctor suggested me to have a massage. So i went for a massage... the massaeur said that my shoulder was still hard even after 30 minutes of session. Arrgghh ... Now , my thigh is so stiff ... aarrrggghhhh ...

it wasn't the pain that killing me .... but, it's the how the people around treat me whenever i took mc . I got 14 days medical leave to use. So as long as i'm within it .. please do not bother me .

I was expected to live for three months .. i've been living in the incubator for a month. These were what i've been told ... So even though i ate healthy food and did exercise ... My health won't be the same with others . I'm the first person to be infected whenever people around me got sick, but i wasn't sick all the time ... My hands, legs etc will go to numb whenever i sit or sleep in the same position for a long time. Whenever i got pregnant, my red blood cell count was never been good. I drink as much milk as possibble ... i ate as much fruits and vege as possibble. i ate everything ... fishes, red meat, white meat ... potatoes ... everything .. just to ensure that i'll stay healthy. I got migraine easily ...

But every time i got mc, there's certain people who will ask me, don't u take vitamin c? don't u do exercise? Sometimes i will ignore it ... but sometimes ... i felt very bothered about it ... i will just ignore them... i know my body, my helath and my capabilities very well ... it's my life after alll ... why should i've been bothered by those people ....

But i am still grateful... despite of these ... i am still considered as healthy person. Why? Alhamdulillah . I don't have any critical illness ... Alhamdulillah ... on and off to be sick ... Allah is forgiving me for the sins that i did .... Alhamdullillah ... Subhanallah ... Allahu Akbar...

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Me n HR

April is the month for me n Hr to quarrel ....

April First / Fool ... i felt like such a fool ... i departed from home at 7.45 am . Spent almost one and half hours in traffic jam ... reach PJ Hilton for Course scheduled at 9 pm ... 15 minutes later. As soon as i sat ... i didn't even take off my handbag, i received a call from one of HR staff ... actually i do like this staff since he's quite hardworking and doesn't even bother how people treat him .... but April First make me mad at him for the first time ... i remember his words clearly...

" K Zihan, Hari ni K zihan sepatutnya attend MIA Course kat PJ Hilton, tadi MIA call kata K Zihan tidak berada di PJ Hilton."

I was just came in, even the instructor just said hello to me, how should i answer him? ... i just answered " Dah ada dah ni." But truly i really mad. Can't he ask me first. 'K Zihan, Where are you? The MIA called. K Zihan belum sampai ye?' Or is he thinking that i'm going to escape the course costing RM750? am i that crazy... if i really want to spend the Co money ... i will go to many courses as possibble... the knowledge is free after all for me... why should i escape such opportunity? ....

April 6 ... i was just came in to the office after 2 days course and one day EL. When i punched-in, in the morning, my punch card has been written A/L on first of April .. i just let it go... around 9 am .. Our Inspector Gadget called.

"Pn azihan, Puan Azihan AL on first kan? Saya tak dapat cari Puan punya surat cuti, boleh tolong hantar kat Hr dept tak?"

"Boleh tolong check tak mana saya pergi on the first dengan staf Hr yang lain?"

"Iyelah, saya tanya kenapa nak marah? Puan cuti on the first kan?"

"Saya tak cuti on the first ... please check with the others."

"Yelah, orang tanya, tak perlu marah-marah." He hanged up just like that ... i was very mad ... really .... It was me who supposed to hang up that call since he just said whatever he wants without asking.


April 16 ... I came at 8.20 .... i just took my drink when one of my colleague said .. " K Zihan .. Inspector Gadget suruh K Zihan hantar borang cuti before 3pm." I took EL on 14 .. Harris caught fever, I was not feeling well on 15, i took MC ... I was just in for few minutes ... I don't know ... Why are they picking at me? .

Sometimes i feel really sad... when i don't even bother what other people are doing and always try to help others .. to ease their burden .... why on earth they're trying to fight with me? i just don't understand ...


Maybe .. it's part of Allah trial on me... How patience i am ... just bear with it Azihan .... Astaghfirullahalazim.....

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

I have a serious problem....

I don't know how to write it ... i think the problem is visiting me again... hahhaha what a nice word i used. I felt very lazy these days. Especially in doing office works. At home, nothing much to do actually ... just ignore all the headache at home...

I don't know whether this is a coincidence or not, but i can see that whenever i'm in messy mood ... the same thing happened to my sis ... Nae ... poor her .. just pray for her that everything will come and go smoothly .... cincaaaa ...

It's been almost a month since my last entry ... it's not that i had been busy ... but i had been lazy ... hhahahahah

so ... any good or bad news in between? ...

Harris caught a fever 2 days ago... his temp hit 39.1 degrees .... the most active person in this house caught fever .... but fortunately it's only for a day... i kept him wet and cold the whole night ... fortunately ... the temp went down to 36.7 on the day after ... Alhamdulillah ...

Went to MIA course in PJ on 1-2/4/2009 ... it was really cracking my head ... i didn't even know what i had practiced before this... lots of things to catch up ... still less time n guidance...

what else? miss my mgmt meeting on 1/4 ... took El on 3/4 ... not feeling good after cracking my brain during the course and cramping my body in the traffic jam... had an argument with one of HR staff .. he said i didn't apply for my leave on first of April... Check it again ... where did i go on the first .. it's not that i went to the course using my own name... it's under co's name plus under HR approval..... herkkkk ...

Still attending the Kursus Haji .. one of the partcipant said that her appeal had been rejected ... we didn't even appeal yet .... the money is yet to be enough plus ... we kept on spending .... aaaahhhh .. i just hope that if we can't make it this year ...i just hope that Allah will invite us to His home next year ... really want to ... it's really touching every time we did the talbiah ... i miss Him so much ... wants to visit Baitullah as soonest as i can ... i just want to be the good person. Just want Allah to forgive me on every wrongdoings i had done .... Insya Allah .. Amin..

anything else? ... hmmm we're going to buy azrah an electronic piano .. cost almost RM3K with 12 installment .... i don't even know whether my decision is right or wrong ... aaahhhhh .... confuse....

i had a backpain today .... really not comfortable with it ... got mc ... miss another Mgmt Meeting even though i had prepared all the materials needed.. not sure what had happened during the meeting ... will know about it tmrw.... just pray for the best ....

Insya Allah .... with the God will